Newspaper writers revolt

The low cost of newspapers has made reporters get payed much less. For a strange reason this makes me want to beat something into oblivion. The reporters at The Robotside Times and from several other newspaper companies have began to revolt against writing their newspapers.

"I never really," said TRT reporter Mikey Robot, "got payed at all." some other quotes, such as "Don't talk to me, freak." and "I don't do that newspaper thing before. Sorry." explain the anger in these reporters. Er, of these reporters. You get it.

I'll be reporting my butt off for the rest of my short life!

A true reporter, signed Mikey.

Robot accidently drops a car

The citizens of Robotside watched in fear as a man in a portable crane picked up the mayor's car (We still don't know who that mayor is) and picked it up 40 feet in the air, approximately. Then he accidently drove down to the bay which was a few miles off of where he had taken the car from, and accidently dropped it in the water.

That's enough to piss a mayor off, but the mayor did not show his face. He did report to his lawyer that the robot who stole his car "...did a great job... ...stealing my car... ...from... ...the bay."

The mayor, according to this combination of quotes, obviously did not understand what had happened. This means he could be unstable as our mayor. The cranedriver, who wasn't done doing his duty, grabbed the mayor's house with the mayor and several of his associates inside, and did them justice (Dropped em' in the lake.).

Helicopter crashes into 1-story building

A helicopter pilot named... uh... Bob, perhaps? Bob Jones? Smith? Fladderstanineer? Anyway, he flew his helicopter into the smallest building ever built in Robotside. Or maybe it isn't. Or maybe it is. Or not. Or maybe.

"I swear I didn't do it!" Said Fladderstanineer, who obviously had done it. "Oh, wait a minute. I swear I didn't mean to do it!" Said Fladderstanineer, who obviously meant to do it. "I HATE YOU ALL!" Said myself, which is true.

Nobody is pressing charges because Nobody owned the house. We will probably not be updating this again, so I'm just gonna have to guess that Nobody is gonna get alot of money. You heard my opinion here first!

Some nobody broke his foot

While the CIA was busy testing their footbreaker, they put out a sign to warn the innocent bystanders. Someone became suspicious and had to find out what was going on. Once in the area with the CIA, the bystander became no longer innocent. The footbreaker had worked.

"These things happen, ya know?" said the Secret Dude of the CIA. "It's never happened before, but I know it does happen... Sometimes. As long as they can't sue us. It's not like they can, though. I mean really. It's not gonna happen. The bystander wasn't innocent no more."

Stolen Police cars found

Some time ago a trash can and some police cars were stolen form a local police office/department/thingy. As the detectives or whatever you wanna call em' decided it was best to not do their work, me and my buddy Paul decided to return our stolen vehicles.

The newspeople were very happy and the Policemen were below content because they had lost their trash can which had a secret stash of doughnuts which this reporter says was "very delish". No further information as to if I will return the trash can or barf up some doughnuts.

Semi truck accident due to Turkeys

As Iym Dehd was racing to get to the grocery store on time in a semi truck for a reason not explained, a giant foot tall turkey ran right in front of him. As the driver turned, the trailer of the semi broke free and tumbled straight into the Blinternational Blank of Blutter, destroying everything that produced the best Blint'n Blutter we've ever tasted.

Nobody was hurt, only the members of the Blank were all brutally killed and torn to pieces all over the countryside. The truck driver also shot himself afterward. And the turkey did a rain dance until he was hit by a speeding sedan.

Still no reports of any injuries.

Warehouse burns down on the city limits!

So therefore we don't really care.